Tuesday, March 24, 2009

March Madness? More Like Borophyl



Am I the only person who thinks that this years tournament has been awfully boring? Don't get me wrong,I have still watched and enjoyed every second of Gus Johnson doing calls like this but there's no Cinderellas, no feel good stories (unless seeing Tyler Hansbrough get punched in the face for the fifteenth time makes you feels as good as it makes me feel), no Davidson, no Stephen Curry's hot mom being shown a hundred times bouncing her jugs up and down as her son facials opponents like Peter North. The best game by far was the Siena/Ohio State double overtime thriller, and thats about it.
Yet, two good things have come out of a first weekend filled with few upsets. Number one, almost everyones bracket is still pretty much intact, because nearly every 1-4 seed advanced.The only people that have suffered are the girls that have Binghamton in the elite 8 because the bear cat is just so darn cute (for the record, that thing is fucking adorable). For Christ sakes,7 people in my pool got 14 or more right and one was me who was retarded enough to take Wake Forest to the final four.
The second is that every single match up is going to be awesome this weekend, because of the amount of high caliber teams still alive. Just look at everyone of those games, and if you don't agree that Digger Phelps and his crew of flunkies wouldn't be there for College Game Day during the regular season, then you sir are a premature ejaculator and should watch this. Regardless of your cumming abilities, the action this weekend will make you jizz in your pants.

Here are some awards so far from the tournament:

MVP- Lazar Hawyard: You may remember him as the retard for Marquette who stepped on the line during an inbounds pass late in the game with Missouri up by two. Thanks to College basketballs version Dan Orlovsky, I still have three of my final four teams.

LVP:
The jackass at CBS who switched away from the Wisconsin/Florida State as a potential game winning shot was mid air. Granted it missed, but you don't cut away from something like unless Jessica Biel is getting taken straight to Pound Town on the court of the other game

Stephen Curry Award For Player Who Looks like He's 14:

This goes to none other than Ryan Rossiter from Siena. He looks like he should be getting wedgies in Middle School from one of the O'Doyle brothers instead of playing in the Tournament


The Joe Flacco Award For Best/Worst Unibrow: Emanuel Mayben


What the fuck is that thing? It looks like he go too drunk, and his friends shaved their pubes and glued them to his face while he was passed out. Jesus Christ, that has got to be the worst uni brow I have ever seen. Buddy, there is no shame in shaving that thing, just please do it!
As always, enjoy the games bitches!

1 comment:

  1. but what about watching the tourny at pickles in the afternoon?

    ReplyDelete