Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Morning Musings: High School. Where Are They Now?

Note: I'm going to start posting "Morning Musings" about just sorta whatever, if I happen to be awake into he morning with nothing better to do, waiting for the heavy dose of Nyquil to kick in. Don't expect coherence.

I'm almost done with my junior year in college and it occured to me early on this Tuesday morning that all that junk people talked in high school about who's really going to be successful isn't really true. Remember that? "All the successful people were called nerds and bullied in high school." No they weren't. Successful people come in all shapes and sizes. Just because you're nerdy in high school doesn't mean you can't be a complete failure too.

The rules aren't the same any more in high school. It used to be, everyone was afraid of the big strong jocky kids. Now everyone's afraid of the nerdy kids who can steal your identity and make a fake Myspace for you, or God forbid, the kid "goes Columbine." It's a new frontier out there. And they make these kids wake up at 6 in the morning! This is poor planning.

Anyways, I bring all this up because it just reminds me that I've been out of high school for a little bit now, even though I feel like I'm still there. Stuff like that is a good wake-up call. Other good wake-up calls always involve hearing about what my peers are up to nowadays, which is why I'm writing this. Because when you're me and you're still writing opinion, it's not that far off from high school. When you're starring in porn or pumping out babies... well... it's a new frontier.

I feel like we've reached the age where you're making some serious life decisions at this point. It's a clear line to draw. Like, the people who are interning at NASA building spaceships to the moon, these people have passed the litmus test. The people who are sitting in their underwear updating blogs at 2 in the morning... the jury's still out.

I've been thinking a lot lately about how excited I am for our five-year reunion in 2011. Not because I care about anyone; don't get the wrong idea. But instead, it's because of the infinite possibilities that anyone could be carrying out right now. It's not going to be the cookie-cutter any more, where the jocks suck and end up bagging groceries, the nerds get hot wives and nice cars, and the journalists show up unshaven and wallowing in student debt. Actually, one of those is still going to happen.

Instead, I propose that we play "Pregnant Bingo!" Which goes as such:

1. You get cards with girls from your class randomly printed on them.
2. You get "Bingo!" when you have a line of five girls who are pregnant or have children.
3. You win a smug sense of self-satisfaction and a box of condoms.

There is a variation of this game for people who married before the age of 20. It is called "I made poor decisions and runed by life Bingo!"

It just goes to show the unpredictability of where people are going with their lives nowadays. The geeks aren't the ones with the awesome jobs any more--probably because no one has a job any more. And the jocks aren't the losers doing grunt work in the same place you grew up.

Nowadays, they're in porn.


  1. so this reminded me that me and hanratty are technically are supposed to organize the reunions. I propose a bargain: We will only follow through if these bingo cards are made.

  2. with you guys running the show, there is no way in hell these reunions get organized.